Nipples and Clits

Is that all there is?

This is more a question for the ladies but I suppose applies to the gents as well. It's basically a question about foreplay, foreplay mainly focusing on manual stimulation of a woman.

What I Get...   The men I've been with have assumed there are really only four erogenous zones. Boobs, snatch, possibly bum and neck. The manual stimulation part is where I've run into the problem. The hand goes downstairs and immediately heads for the target area. Very little in the way of gentle caressing of the lips or anywhere else. Maybe a minute of stimulation and then a throbbing finger impales itself into me. Ouch! A girl needs a chance to get herself a little lubricated before that bad boy slides itself on in there. A little attention is paid to the clit but it's the wrong kind of attention. Maybe I'm just extra sensitive but rubbing me hard there is irritating and almost painful. Soft and gentle initially seems more appealing to me.

What I Want...   The whole body is an erogenous zone is it not? Why don't they touch all of it? It's so nice to feel fingers and hands trailing over all of me, my arms, my legs, my feet, everywhere, breasts and snatch included. Gently rub all of my sex, not just my clit and cunt. There's more to a woman's snatch then just that. And gently, rubbing it gently, to me, is way more of a turn on than probing fingers. There's the lips, the anus, all of these delicious little places that seem to be forgotten.  —Jordana Winters

I think you're running into a lot of trouble if your idea of foreplay is, 'Brace yourself honey, here I come!' —Phillip C. McGraw

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From Patricia
I am Jill's complete opposite [see Jill's entry below]:  Having enormous breasts has left my nipples without much feeling.  The nipples do get hard with prodding, but not so much from pleasure as a biological response that will make it possible to breast-feed my children when I have them.  But travel an inch in any direction and the nerves become more plentiful - I'll never tire of a tongue running along the crevice where my breasts meet my rib-cage - Heaven!

From Jill
I love to be touched all over, soft touches, strokes, the use of feathers or anything soft just barely skimming my body. But my most favorite spot, the one that can get me off without my any parts of my pussy being touched, is my nipples. They are very sensitive and just rubbing them can get them hard and thick like the eraser on the end of a pencil. The feeling of having my nipples, touched, rubbed, tweaked, twisted, pulled and clamped will cause me to have multiple O's.

From Gary
A few years ago my wife was very frustrated at having 38 inch boobs but very flat nipples. It wasn't a problem in our enjoying sex, once I started sucking her nipples they would come to life and stay erect for some time. She was more concerned that something physical was wrong and this in turn affected her confidence. She eventually had nipple reconstruction, an expensive exercise but one that resulted in both nipples being proud again and enabling her to buy some feminine bras and wear more revealing blouses, tops and dresses. Her confidence was boosted, the now very attractive nipples being a focal point of interest for our male friends and others she met at parties.

Three months later I was very happy when she told me that at her company's annual conference she had been invited by the CEO for the first time to join him at his 'VIP' party, she and her new points joining in the fun, resulting in her getting some much overdue promotion. She's still there, now a VP, and very at ease with her still firm nipples.

From Anonymous
While I enjoy both very wandering, gentle, slow play and very focused, hard, fast stuff, overall, in terms of the intensity of the orgasms, ones I can feel and daydream about for days, I would have to vote for slow, soft, and looong.

And not just on the clit, but all over (neck/ear kisses and strokes, holding or kissing/sucking my fingers, gentle stroking or tugging with his lips on my genital lips or tender kisses or even breaths on my inner thighs, his hands caressing my ass or hips or elsewhere as he tentatively moves his mouth over me, and nipple play and mouth kissing and taking his time and just tease and touch me oh so softly and slowly, all over my genitals and the rest of me, focusing more on my clit as I become more and more aroused (and I let him know!) but still slowly and softly and teasingly, and damn, I just explode. Then I want him inside me, in the worst way, now! I am agreeable to anything (not that he asks anything I would normally not be agreeable to, but I am just so satisfied and still coming, I just totally get into whatever it is...I am the proverbial putty in his hands...very moist, willing, responsive putty)

My lover is very good at this, but sometimes, when he is over-eager, he goes too hard and too fast, no matter how I try to gently urge him to slow down and go softer (he can just get to where he is going for the gold, so to speak, and just wanting to fuck) and while I do come from it, it is soo not as good as when he's aroused but not manic and takes his time. 

I find taking my time with his foreplay helps him overcome this tendency to rush and be a bit "hamfisted", maybe since he's already gotten so much pleasure, short of orgasm, that he is able to delay his gratification more easily. I find that when we start off with me, he is much more likely to get over-eager/rough than when we start off with him, bring him almost but not quite there and then shift into oral/digital on me. Just our experience.

I would have to agree with what some have said; Ladies, do the same for your men...slow and soft and long. See if they enjoy it, at least...I find my man sometimes just has no patience for it, and will urge me to be faster and harder and more, uh, "focused", but other times he really loves it...we must all take our cues and pay attention and do what our lover is indicating they prefer at the time.

Men, go slooow and soft and explore as many areas as possible before getting to the clit or even the genital area. Just nothing I, speaking for myself, love more than a long, slow, soft bout of cunnilingus and/or hand job which engages as many parts of me as possible until I am flooding and convulsing...Oh, except getting fucked afterwards!

From Desperate Wife
My husband doesn't like foreplay, I can't live without it. I don't want to lose him and I don't think I can cheat on him either. He seems not be interested in what I have trying to tell him during all these years. He says it is my problem, he does not have women like me liking kissing and cuddling. He refuses to visit a doctor. We have kids, I love him and I need him for the support. I can't live without kissing either. It is horrible as there is nothing I can do.

From DE
Totally agree with any lady who wants her whole body touched as it is a total erogenous zone.

My wife of 27 years, gets an entire full body massage. Her backside first, starting with her feet and moving up slowly and satisfying every inch of her. She will quickly spread her legs as I get to the back of her knees and just barely touching her snatch on the way up begins her orgasms. The same for the front side.

From there, she gets her snatch shaven. Then, eaten and then all of me from any position of my choosing. It is a great 90 minute session.

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